-The Afters lyrics
Dear you,
Letter salutations are always funny. "Dear x", "My dear x", "Dearest x", etc. The funny thing is that each of those greeters are adjectives for you. You are dear to me. Actually, you are the dearest to me, and are the dearest thing I have: you're my dearest blessing.
Each blessing is equal in that they are all undeserved and measures of God's grace. But if I had to relinquish everything I had, every other blessing I've been given, you would be the one thing I kept.
I've had you from the beginning. I've never gone through anything without having you by my side. In less generic terms, I've never gone through anything without sitting on the edge of your bunk-bed at 3 AM telling you about it. I've never had a fight with mom that you didn't hear about. I've never cared about something without pouring out my soul to you. We've braved a lot of storms: a lot of family fights, a lot of angry tears, a lot of hurt, a lot of shame, a lot of loss, a lot of confusion. A lot of things that detracted from what we thought we wanted.
But you and I have also been given so much. And I love you for never allowing me to stop realizing that. In the eye of each hurricane, you look out around us and figure out how we're going to get out. In the fog of every dark trial, you brave the nothingness and insist upon hope. There's a side to you that no one else has seen. It's the side that goes unnoticed when one hasn't lived with you for sixteen years, or shared the same bathtub toys, or lived each other's backstories. It's a side that is unappreciated when everyone else only knows you for your funky hair or jokes or punkish music. It's a side that I always forget to tell you I cherish.
In the worst of things, I've still always had you. And that sense of a bond and understanding has been enough to keep our hearts centered on the hope of possibilities, the fire of what's right, and the comfort of an authentic companion.
And the recipient of this letter is painfully obvious; I know. There's no other way for me to tell the world how meaningful you are to me without telling them the depth of our history. History means a lot to me; just having spanned a lot time with another human being creates an iron bond. And the sense of that bond has led to beautiful things in your case. Even the simple, "Hey Em, it won't always be like this" that you occasionally drop speak intensely to my heart. You can make me laugh; you can frustrate me beyond belief; you can move my heart to a depth of gratitude that I didn't know existed. You have never stopped giving of your heart to minister to me.
I don't know if its selflessness or immaturity. Either way, your elastic heart springs back and forth with empathy and ministry for the world around you. You're a leader, a missionary, a fighter, a protector.
And in the tenderest of ways, you have protected me. You have protected me from dismally discarding hope in darkness. So keep on blasting your Green Day and watching your Psych episodes. Keep on wearing your neon shirts and cheap aviators. Keep on styling your hair like Jimmy Neutron. Keep on with your innovative thought-processes. I'll love you for it and pick on you for it, but it never comes down to just that. It comes down to the instrument in God's hands that you are, and the mighty power with which he uses you. You're an inexpressibly amazing human being. I'll never get over what a thrill it's been to grow up next to you.
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